I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
im home for a while(:
i shall stop being a brat,whining&complaining abt stuff.i should have known that i jst didnt matter to anyone!ooh.excellent.i should have known.really.that i nv ever rly mattered to anyone.my existence is just smth too extra to notice.no wait,everyone's got their own life.but im just not in it,not cut out to be in.i thought wrng.maybe,this place was a mistake all along.leave,is what i should do,everyone would be much much relieved&happier without my stupid extra prescence.isnt it that way?no,im not depressed;not drunk.im clearer now,then anyone,than anytime.i've woken&seen stuff more clearly,stuff i shouldnt see or know.its not that i want to isolate myself,its cause' i feel out of place.oh sure,maybe everyone's gonna go,"stop the self pity.",&start whispering behind my back about my stuff.fine,i'll shut my trap.in turn,you people just stop your fake concern&even more hypocrital smiles.who said i couldnt survive on my own?i'll jst show that i can.bye.
im not going to hide in a corner&cry like a small kid;like i used to.im not going to lost a single second of sleep over this.im not going change myself because of this.cause' it doesnt matter to me either.abandon,talk for all you people want.(:
&I thought...Nevermind.