I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
well,happy belated birthday to me(: i woke up ytd morning to see 14 unread msgs -.- then went for a 2 hour plus A maths lesson in the morning.stupid hanafi didnt come so you owe me a big present :D after A maths,went off to pw for tuition.william owes me a book,vincent owes me a present!then then.yeah,i had E maths tuition ytd.circles are fun.haha.met weijia at macs cus he passing me my b'day present plus abby's.havent seen him for ages,i cant even rmbr.anyway.first look at aby's present,i thought it was a pig.it turned out to be a tortoise.hee.(: weijia's was a lil musical instrument! i was soooo fascinated with it,kept playing with it.turn turn turn turnnnn...!supr cute. xD awwwhh.night time lullaby.HEH.then supposed to meet them for dinner but abby msged me and asked me for dinner so yup,i cancelled with them & went with abby,shearen,nicole,imee they all instead.left mavis tuition earlier to have dinner with them at pasta mania.shearen & i shared a pizza of which i was too full to eat after 2 slices =/ no idea why.shearen was hungry though.(: nicole & imee freaks me out sometimes.they both came together,smile together then said "happy birthday!" together. o.0 freaky.but very cute,like two twin kids.haha.one in blue one in pink somemore.we took pictures!then imee said she wanted to go library to return book.so me,shearen & imee went first as aby & nicole "claimed"they wanted to go toilet.or maybe they did lah. =x near the library,imee was like,"stop here lah,wait for they all."so we stopped at the nearby play ground there.& we wait.far far away we saw nicole & abby dunno doing what.then i was like wondering what they doing & imee went "what they doing ah?call them bah,ask them come." IN THE END.it was a PLOT.(now it explains imee & nicole's long disappearing to "toilets.")smart one imee,for trying to distract me.they bought mango cake. :D haha.with nicole,very hard,(yet failing to do so) to light the candles.they sang a birthday song & i made a wish.mmm.i shall not say what but yeah.then lack of utensils.what,be indians & use hand dig to eat ah.lol.imee & nicole got spoons for a nearby mama shop so we all digged in.(: forgot to take a picture of the cake,only until halfway through.so we tried our best,& took a picture of the well,very distorted cake,with our spoons.snap snap snap,more pictures & yup,abby & shearen went off first.then me,imee & nicole walked all the way back to pw.walked in mph then wait for mum to come.mum came about 9 to pick me,then went gary's house to get all my stuff.&....i realized my geog notes are all STOLEN/LOST.fuck.die lah.all GONE.zip,zero,nothing.dammit.all my diagrams,paper & stuff.i was panicking.ah,nvm.had a short talk with gary on some stuff.mm.then i went home.to study moreeee.(yes nicole,i study & goes for classes in sch even i its my birthday -.-)
TODAY!
wellll.vincent promised a 3 day crash course geog would confirm make me pass for mye's.if i do pass,then he did the impossible.cus you know why?no matter what teacher,whoever it is,whatever they do,or no matter how much they keep explaining/teach,i nvr,evr,passed my geog before.let me elaborate.nvr more than 40 before,in fact.stress on the it,nvr evr before.get my pt?yeah.i nvr evr passed my physical geog before since sec 1 till now.& its not that i didnt study.i spend alot more time on it than other subs.but well.im not phy geog material.however,vincent says so,then i okay,set! this morning,crash course.9 am to 6.30 pm.cool right?nvr eat lunch.jst geog geog geog at the center.biang.when we got out of the room,our brains were dead,his hand was breaking due to the drawings & explanations on the board.haha.soo yup,constructive studying done today.yay.2days more to go for geog,vincent!cannn de laaaaa.(: try try try.if i pass my geog,mildred yap will go omg omg,miracle happened.& i'll tell her its your work okay.since you were her ex student like.....erm.4 years ago.LOL.but you were one of the best students right.too bad you look too ah beng lerh,she reject you when you apply for geog teacher position in TK.heh heh.& then you'll say "knowledgable ah beng mah!".zzzzz.then met them at 7 at the beach for dinner cus i cancelled out on them ytd.oh man,hilarious as usual.i could hardly eat.laughed too much.now my cheekbones hurt.they bought yam cake! yumm.we ended up playing around with the cake though.face had streaks of cake/cream -.- im not the only one though.wahahaha. xD jst reached home.yup yup.funnn day!
RANDOMS!
>say it if its worth saving me.
>come please,im calling.
>hurry,im falling.
>show me what its like to be the last one standing.
>nick's wife is damn...scary.very very.
>the korean boy is so cute! (he's a kid,by the way.)
>imagine boonhao KNITTING. o.0
>yes vincent,can deeee.crash course,crash course!
>to abby,shearen,nicole & imee <3333,& thanks for everything.
>to them,ba bi ge da tou gui la! zao dian si zao dian chao sheng laaaa(:
>some parents worry too much.
>CHEM ON TUESDAY.chammm.
>so,get tangled up in me!
> im the girl thats kicking the coke machine. :D
>"the,the,the...map keeps,...well.changing!" HEH.vincent,i didnt know okay.so STOP LAUGHING.official fact,maps DONT CHANGE.*
to you : well.im surprised that you bothered to wish me happy birthday.although you nvr replied anymore.you still ignored me the next day during class.whats you problem ah.i heard there's a motive behind it.no matter what it is,i think its stupid.very.nothing's gonna change after this ignoring game.try me.im not letting myself shake,even if i do.get this right.fuck.
some people i expected them to know/rmbr didn't.yet some people i expected least to know/rmbr actually wished me.imagine,even 29 did.hellooo.that shocked me big time.
the 2 most unexpected.
tennisa & rachel.
tennisa: im so surprised.its been...years!i think.omg omg.thanks okay.<333 i miss the old times.awhh.
rachel: yoooo cute girl! it was unexpected but well,thanks. :D
overall.im a happy girl for now.(:
-hey..thanks to you all.really.for everything.junjie,that was erh...pretty smart ytd night -.- surprise surprise.ha ha.
you asked me what i see you as & what am i to you.here's your ans.
you're a cool guy.you're smart.you make me laugh.you make people's day bright.you're good looking.you've been there for me.you nvr broke your promises before,be it big or small.you a deep thinker.our parents are good friends.you're 20,going on to SMU.you're a nice guy.you're cheerful.you can play the violin damn pro.you're my type of ideal guy.but,its only these.thats,all.i hope you get it.sorry.
&I thought...Nevermind.
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