I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
forget about my previous post.
im ready to kill someone now,i swear.
fuck fuck fuck.
im so fucking fustrated,irritated,& mixed up.people are messing with my mind & yeah,i think im losing control of myself.
im really dont want my heart to keep aching like this just because of your on&off ignorance.you know why?cos when my heart starts to ache,i know it spells BIG TIME TROUBLE for me,dammit.i hate it when i fall into the Le'amour,love river,hard.HA.fucking bullshit,i always end up in great depression,unable to get over & stuff like that.& im starting to think since im so retarded & dumb in this kinda stuff,i should jst block it out.
but nooooo.its not sparing me,not even a lil bit.
i dont want to keep getting my hopes high & get them crashed again later on.
disappointments & doubts.
over,over,over & over again.
thanks,for making me like that. ( again. )
oh fuck,im getting EMO.ALL THIS STUPID EMO DEPRESSION SWEARINGS & SHIT.IM SICK & TIRED OF ALL THIS & I NEED TO TALK TO MY BEST FRIEND BADLY,BUT YEAH.I CAN'T COS SHE'S BUSY.great.now im acting like a small petty whining child,
like her mum wouldnt buy her a lollipop.& that she's kicking up a fuss for nothing.perfect.
&I thought...Nevermind.