I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
> i smell something fishy in the atmosphere around.hmm.
> this is real friendship,its true.friends who are willing to give things up to help.
> bloody hell,you're hurting him,do you know that.your ignorance,fuck you.
> lin an,cheer up! : D things will be fine,she's NOT WORTH IT,come onnnn.
> you were strong and firm with you advice and words.a definite confirmation for me & the group.thank you,changxu.
> CHANGXU.you're the best person i've ever known.really.i owe you alot.
> "...huh,what did I DO?!!" LOL.
> im not cori/izhaq's girlfriend,mr tan -.- least of all gary's.
> i don't have a boyfriend LAH.
> SINGLES GROUP.whoo!
> stupid alex w/ lit hmk & making me wait.
> my phone msges are blasting.
> stupid lin an,SHUT UP =/
> junjie,YOUR PHONE IS ALIVE AGAIN.YESSSSSS!FINALLY(:
> & now you say your phone has problems again.wth jun jie -.-
> got myself drunk on tuesday night,splitting headache next day.
> hell,cant my pocket skirt stop vibrating in classes?
> i didnt sleep for the whole of last night.
> chinese O level oral SUCKED BIG TIME TODAY. : [ DIEEEE.
> i swear,that china examiner is damn scary.
> that china examiner sounds very very formal,& is an actor who acted in SEVEN SWORDS (that chinese china movie) me & sky agreed on this conclusion : D
> eh big shot actor okay.he was great in seven swords.
> I SWEAR IT WAS HIM!
> ahhh,i PANICKED when i saw the examiner.kinda stunned there though.
> sky says, " he using that kind of beat,best thing is,to FOLLOW HIS BEAT." LOL.thats what we did for O level chinese oral examiner.omg -.-
> sky wanted to ask his autograph -.-
> my friends scared donna. ( china people. )
> linlong,BLOODY HELL,STOP LAUGHING AT ME,DAMMIT x(
> don't keep OH'ING me.fuck you. i need reaction,dammit.
> forget it,I GIVE UP.
> big fat disappointment,AGAIN.sigh.
> where d'you go,i miss you so.
> IM WAITING. ( over & over again. )
> its up to you to decide now.
> HAIYAH.i love all of you all,happy? lacking love people. -.- lol.
> it was a crazy convo on tuesday night.
> kailun,GOD.i love you man.thanks for the advice & sorry i didnt listen to it,though.
> lifeng.you're the MAN,man.HAHA.oh yeah,are you in the hospital already after eating $110 worth of ba guas?(: senseless,as usual.
> thanks alex,for everything.accompanying/listening to me.as always.the COURT MEETING WILL CONTD TMR : D
> jingyi,we will SURVIVE O LEVEL CHINESE.(:
> please note that i am not fully healed and moved on yet.
> your words hurt me on tuesday night.
> tears tears tears.
> memories are irritating and messing with my mind.
> looking back,I HAVE BEEN STRONG.
> i will be the superwoman who smiles through the day,COS YOU GUYS BELIEVE IN ME! : D awhhh.
> omg omg OMG.brian is like,indirectly part of the china grp. YAY,huge surprise today!(: didnt know you were good friends with junjie they all.
> A maths retake test tmr.DIE.hai,forget about studying.SCREW IT.
> need i say more.
> changxu & linyi are the 'best' in bowling.confirm all "STRIKE." actually its like,out of 6 tries,5 times the bowl drop into the hole & not hit anything -.-
> me & lin an couldnt stop laughing.
> xiang long shi ba zhang! ROFL.
> alex,your acting kinda sucks -.-
> PIRATES OF CARRIBEAN ON SATURDAY : D
> uhh,sky,can i like,consider if i wanna go for the chalet thing on sat?
> im done,HEARTBREAKING. :]
> found out alot of stuff today.HMMMM.
> SIGH,i shall stop all this emo shit and random stuff.
> jasmine,dont curse them! SOCIAL TOLERANCE.
> need to drink.but i cant,will be a good girl and listen to ge ge changxu's advice.(:
> I AM A SWEET & NICE GIRL. : D
> ah ber says slap slap to those who dont do well in chinese O level.
> ours was the hardest of all.
> aiyah,who cares bout ah noi anyway.
> jillene,PANIC SESSION.
> i've became a freelance ENGLISH TUTOR. -.-
> I LOVE YOU GUYS,I SWEAR.IM TOUCHED,THANK YOU,ALL OF YOU. <33333
okay.was jst rambling on stuff the past few days.im like emotionally unstable nowadays.but im kinda more fine now.went pw ytd with lifeng they all to walk around before going back to sch to wait for lin an & alex.some nasty stuff happened, (girl's fight),but i've learnt to tolerate and be nice.(: hanged around in bedok with lin an to talk.sigh,we both as losers in love.today....went to bowling with lin yi,lin an,changxu after 0 levels.they kinda waited for me.abandoned poor alex alone in after sch care,HEH.then went to play bowling,i swear it was HILARIOUS.really.got a video clip of changxu's stupid moves -.- damn pro.then i went pw for A maths tution due to a test coming up tmr.i havent fully studied & i dont really care cos im really tired now.alex,I WAS KIDDING. okay.off to sleep early today.for once,12 plus.a record.its the earliest im sleeping this month.YAY.
&I thought...Nevermind.