I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
> okay,im sorry im kinda high lah.
> you ain't him.
> sour feelings take over.
> we talked last night and you stopped replying,23.
> i guess i shall start to accept the fact that you will always affect me in someway or another.
> sigh,all the hurt.
> & now you.you made me wait in katong for like 2 hours plus.
> you are bloody so not worth it,not worth the wait.
> you lied to me,fuck you.
> LIAR,you were seen.
> i truely give up.
> you & your stupid excuses,dont bother.anymore,really.
> shall...try to block you out of my mind.
> please dont do this to me anymore.
> OH YESSSS.JUNJIE'S PHONE IS ALIVE FINALLY. : D im not barbie,stupid guy -.- & stop smoking dammit.
> can i like,die now.
> me,junjie& lin an almost commited suicide by jumping out of the 7th floor window of katong on friday.
> alex & junjie,the new masters of "xi gou " in bowling.(:
> kailun,help.
> alex,dont be dumb.
> dota dota dota,HAI.guys & DOTA.
> junjie lives on stealing people's food. -.- he only eats the food he manages to steal.LAME.
> zhou kan,HELLO. (:
> you..fucking lying bastard asshole,shut up.
> i was too blind to see.
> afternoons at katong mall with them.
> SCREW THE A MATHS TEST.HAIYAH.
> the sec 2's of china grp are like kinda rejoicing,STUPID PEOPLE,dont lame lah,i dont want to fail anything & stay back one more year with you all to graduate! alex & changxu,stop cheering! -.-
> you're very right,changxu.time to end it all,clear.
> thanks kailun,lin an,changxu,alex & junjie for sacrificing your dota playing to talk to me. <333
> alex,THINGS ARE TAKING A TURN WITH EXTERNAL INFLUENCE.ARE YOU GAME.LOL.
> the bronte sisters are my favourite lit classic writers.
> wuthering heights,agnes grey & jane eyre.awh.sweet.
> no more thinking of the past.
> after all,what matters is the present,isn't it?
> the moment i saw you cry.
> prisoner #&@%
> i've got an IQ of negative 200 -.- wth.
> kboxing babey!
> donna,thanks for calling to say you saw ziwen.lol.you have no idea,really.dont ask,but thanks.
> nicole & imee.sorry for keeping it from you all.still,thanks.
> sky's dunno what chalet ytd.sorry ah,i was lazy to go.
> there is definitely SOMETHING FISHY.
> loserrrrr.
> paradiz centre.
> that was not very nice,kailun.tsk.
> there are many more other people more unfortunate than me.
> physics,history & geog test coming hot on heels.DIE LAH.
> i should consider staying back one year to improve on my basics.OMG,I CANT BELIEVE I ACTUALLY SAID THAT O.0
> why am i so lazy to get a tagboard?
> oh well,i'll probally make the highest record of anonymous people tagging to hate me or hurl bad stuff at me anyway.
> & above all.
> sure,im dumb,stupid,senseless,blind & foolish.try sueing me.
> ...your ignorance on & off attitude.you don't care,i know.
> HAIYAH.shall concentrate on trying to play the piano. (it'll be a miracle if can. )
> i've changed too much,far too much.
> the ncc posting shocked me quite alot.still,congrats shahdan. : D ASM BIG SHOT HUH.
> "i've got better things to do than to watch MEN run after ONE BALL." wth! mdm mariam,you're the WOMAN,man. LOL.
> brian & sunny.we're all interrelated in the china grp -.- amazing.
> huge shopping spree at ZARA,MANGO,TOPSHOP,SERIES,BUM,BILLABONG,CHARLES & KEITH,COACH & least of all,ESPRIT. : D rockeddd!
> teng & his 0 levels.poor guy.
> LAINE, <333333.sophie too,SARANG HAE.lol.
> STACY MY GIRL,IT'S BEEN AGES.
> ahhh,CLARA, MY SWEET (: still rmbr the old times.
i know im being super super random that its kinda messy.but i like it : D haha.hit ZOUK on friday night with fake ids and yeah,it was great.all the drinks with a cute lil cherry on top.haha.im kinda hung over still,from last night.& the feeling sucks.but it was still fun.ytd didnt go pirates of carribbean with changxu,alex & kailun.had some stuff to settle.abby was asking if i was at DXO ytd night,cos she & shahirah wanted to go.but i couldnt make it,neither could the china people so yeah,im not sure if they tried getting in last night.i suggested quite alot of ways to her,she's like sianjipua.LOL.had to go hospital early this morning cos i vomited blood again ytd.& i was given the suggestion of staying in the hospital for 2 weeks and OF COURSE I REJECTED IT ON FIRST BASIS.mad ah.2 weeks.thinking of all the tubes and injections,im scared already.besides,think of all the tests i would have to make up for and the lessons i would miss.the one week in ths hospital few weeks back was bad enough.very very bad.so,don't be crazy,i wont.die then die lah.i dont really care.ha.irish then called me up & we went kboxing at suntec city.wanted to catch pirates but didnt in the end.teng joined us after his studying session.HEY MAN,LONG TIME NO SEE.(: we hit sizzlers to eat and then ben & jerry's.oh man,i've absolutely in love with raw smoked salmon with lemon on top.ahhhh.damn nice.then we went on a huge shopping spree at like zara,coach,mango,topshop....etc.went to marina square too,to shop on at S FOX...etc.teng was made bellboy(: as usual.ahh,me & irish are broke.lol.spent like,i cant rmbr.we used credit cards.thats why.we almost called a truck to send our stuff home.heh heh.we're like rich ass spoiled brats : D changxu called me to ask whre i was & scolded me for not staying at home to rest.then i said i was shopping like nobody's buisness and he said something i couldnt really hear and ( of course he wouldnt repeat it ),but it sounded very much like "HAI,WOMEN,WOMEN." ROFL.nice one,changxu.
mm.cynthia asked me to watch pirates on tuesday.the other half of china people asking on saturday,before/after road run.abby,are you in for pirates on monday?or else i have to make a choice between the two. =/
&I thought...Nevermind.
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