I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
I don't seem to be having the drive/motivation tonight.Maybe cos I'm feeling down & tired at the same time,so I just want to go crash on my bed&sleep,then forget everything,just have a good rest.Unfortunately...I doubt so,at least,anytime much before O's i guess.
4H netball people,good job okay! : D
& Shit there's BodyJam tmr.
I dont want any accidents : ( AGAIN.
It's 1.30 in the morning now,27th March.
I've got..like four more parts to revise/restudy.Plus attempt some O levels qns for Geog TYS.
Looks like I'm going to sleep at 5 or maybe not sleep at all.
Off to mug more,sweet dreams to whoever's sleeping their asses off now.
It's been a long time I've felt this way.
This feeling of crashing down over&over again.
This helpless,lost feeling....feeling of loss,pain...despair.
...A very very,very long time ago since I remembered how it felt like.
So long ago...so far down buried that i almost forgot how bad it felt&everything.
&Now.
I'm feeling the exact same,but much...much worse.
...In fact.I've never felt any worse than I do now.
&I thought...Nevermind.
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