I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
A few weeks ago,I'm damn sure the whole world knows about how I fell down during P.E playing netball &scratched both knees damn badly,elbow,shoulders...&face.Until now face still got mark.The 'third world war' country person image -.-
& NOW.
...I sprained my lil fourth toe of my right foot during Body combat.
Good Game man,honestly.
Zzzzzz.It's like,I've never fallen down &scratched myself,I've never sprained any part of myself before,&this year in just a few short weeks,I've accomplished both for the first time in my life.(?!!!) Tell me how wierd it is.Maybe it's cos I havent been sleeping...I guess.
Shit lah.Everything damn screwed up.
No,wait.I cleared my geog though! I love mildred yap man,she's like the most fantastic teacher,really.Besides her temper flarings &sharp tongue lah,of course.
I failed my A maths horribly thanks to really dumb careless mistakes,I can't believe I was so careless,I feel like killing myself.A maths &E maths confirm both each F9 already lah.
& HELLO PEOPLE.We need to get a headon w/ the scriptttt! Mickey's ticking,dears.
...It's like I keep studying &studying like crazy every day until wee hours in the morning without any sleep for many continuous days.All the studying goes inside my heard,filling up the hollow emptiness&sense of loss within me.It's like...a feeling of self fufillment that makes me feel,whole i guess.
But I'm tired.
So very tired.
I'm sorry I can't stop.
I just can't stop,cos I'd have time to think then.
&I'm afraid if i stop even for a moment....
I'll die.
&I thought...Nevermind.
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