I let myself believe this was possible.
That it was,in fact,already happening.
But I'm not going to fret over the stupidity of believing.
Wouldn't that just be a waste of psychic energy?
Another excuse to engage in an endless cycle of negativity?
Experts in the field of human behaviour,
would agree that my will to believe was not a sign of stupidity.
Experts would agree that my will to believe was a sure sign of INSANITY.
...&It was that wretched,misguiding,leechlike parasite called hope.
Today,ziwen's birthday celebration.Didnt make it for geog in the morning cos I was unwell and mum was like,"If you don't stay home,you're not going out in the afternoon for your friend's birthday celebration." & i went "T.T!!!?" I was glad to stay in bed in the morning though (Ms yap is so going to kill/strangle me on monday,uh oh.) Met Kaileun,Wanzhuo,Changxu & Lin yi at bugis street to shop for ziwen's birthday present,which one of the shirts we bought for him,we had changxu to try it on.& I tell you,he looks..so.damn.good in that formal black shirt with thin silver lines striped down,all of were like "Omgz,changxu damn shuaiiiiiii eh.You want to buy one for yourself?!!!" So therefore me & wanzhuo came to a conclusion : Guys look fucking good in formal shirts. (Except for a few cos it'll make them look like ah bengs instead.)
& I told changxu to get rid of all his t-shirts immediately cos it makes him look really stupid(oops.) & ordered him immediately to clean out his wardrobe and refill it with formal shirts instead,short sleeve or long sleeve,anything but t-shirts.Then some others met us at bugis mrt station,& when alex came,my jaw literally dropped.He was wearing that same purple crown shirt from that time,and I've seen him wear that for like what,6 times??!!! Which sometimes in two three consecutive weeks on saturdays,I see him in that same shirt. -.- Hur,I swear that I'm going to get him more shirts man,he is seriously in need of it.As in,really really reallyyyyyy in need.
So then we all head to pasir ris to find ziwen at the bbq pit there,had a long talk with lifeng about stuff from the mrt,on the bus ride until walking to the pit.& we're both pretty horrified at what's happening,but I suppose we can't really do anything bout it but just sit & watch it happen.All we can do is to pray that no one gets hurt,hopefully.& I realised that they really like to suan me,walao.They were all sitting on the railing,then i was just standing and holding onto the railing then they were like "Eh eh eh,climb up and sit lah! You cannot right,nevermind nevermind we all understand~" Wtffff! Then i gave them that look & just jumped up and sat on the railing which all of them counted to 3 & started clapping for my supposedly "Mission impossible".HUR,assholes. : ( Think you all cute ah.
There was about...40 plus people?We were separated into two pits,really alot of people around.Then we went to the beach to play,everyone started doing dumb things,even our most dignified da ge,Lu Changxu horh.Sadly I can't post any pics on blogger cos it doesnt seem to be able to upload? o.0 I dont know.Then there was this 'making out session' between changxu,alex&fengbo...ewwww very sick.Then another um......hot kissing session between Lin yi & Fengbo which all of us made quite a din out of it.Siah lah,they really hold very long man,& it's mind polluting,gah! For these photos,you can ask me for it : D Then go spread around,yay.I just realised how cute fengbo is cos he says & does the stupidest things,HAHA.Like he'd take my cam & act like a pro then end up messing up the settings in my cam ( you ass lah. ) If he had a mustache like Jay chou,he would look like a replica of jay chou already,oh so cool.
I'm thankful for you bunch and all the times together plus the times you all have been there for me.I'm specially grateful to these guys who feels almost like my kin brothers,Changxu,Kaileun and Lifeng. Much love.
Im damn tired & I just reached home.Off to contd my reading of the chapters for this week (Geog,Ss & History). Xoxo!
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Dont you think it's time to put a fullstop to everything?
An end to this...mess.
So tell me,does it hurt or worry you that I might not be there anymore the next time you ever turn around expecting to see me standing there waiting as usual,as I've always been?
23 stars ; You do remember afterall.
So maybe I might be wrong...but don't you miss her?
&I thought...Nevermind.
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